Show Me, Don’t Tell Me

Show me, don't tell me [Marcin Rzucidlo / Life Puzzle Coach]

I don’t have to read your mind.

It’s enough that I will see what you do. Then I will know what you think and what you feel.

What you do manifests what you think and what you feel.

It is important to understand this phenomenon in interactions between people. It is their behaviors (not words) that show what they think and feel. About themselves. About their environment. About you.

Recently, I worked with my client on building motivation in his team. We wondered how to increase their internal motivation. We also thought about how he, as the team leader, can know that people will become motivated. He cannot get right into their heads. And their verbal declarations can be misleading.

And there’s where the point of this post can become useful.

In order to know if his people are motivated, we designed a set of behaviors that (if present) will show that they are. If they do not show those behaviors, that will tell that there is no motivation or that it is still low.

This is the presence of particular behaviors that will measure the level of their actual motivation, engagement and commitment. No matter what they will say.

This method becomes useful when you think of measuring other unmeasurable concepts. Motivation, happiness, fulfillment, relations, love. They are so abstract that your subjective view on them can be distorted. However, if you define them on the level of specific behaviors (yours or others’) you will be able to objectively say if they exist or not.

Make a behaviorally fabulous day 🙂

– Marcin

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